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What to Do When Dementia Becomes an Uninvited Visitor in an Unmarried Romantic Partnership: 12 Steps to Help
As the new year approaches, we like to count our blessings—good health, interesting work, close friends and family, and the freedoms we enjoy daily in our democracy. At the same time, we are preparing for the vicissitudes that come with ageing. One of the issues many of us will struggle with if we’re in an unmarried romantic partnership is the appearance of an unwelcome visitor—the cognitive decline of a romantic partner, the consequences of which are almost beyond our powers of anticipation. It comes on us like a rash, slowly at first often masquerading as hearing loss or forgetful senior...
Digging My New Digs While Mastering a New City
It’s been more than three months since I downsized and moved into a one-bedroom apartment in the Big Apple. I have taken only a tiny bite of my new city, but the adventures continue as I partake of its many wonders and offerings. Exploring New York City is a little like sipping a city version of a sparkling cocktail, once you get used to the taste. It goes down quick and easy as it sloshes from one pursuit to another. I slowly make my new apartment my home. What is home? Because I’ve been a bit transitory since my husband...
What We Cannot See: Let’s Focus on Our Inner Beauty in the Beautiful New Year
We all know that beauty can be on the surface and shallow. So, we say, let this New Year be a celebration of beauty that’s less obvious and more the kind that lurks beneath the surface. During this holiday season, it feels right to remind ourselves of the loveliness within all of us. In fact, as our mothers told us years ago, true beauty shines from within. We are not hothouse flowers. No one is perfect looking, and most of us are beautifully imperfect. We are born with big noses, large foreheads, awkwardly coltish legs or short squat ones, squished...
Crave a Sense of Belonging? Finding a Community Helps
The other day Margaret was schmoozing with the concierge in her new apartment building who told her he’s worked there for 10 years and loves his job. “What do you love most about it?” Margaret asked. “It feels like family,” he said. What does that mean? It’s simple. The concierge thinks that he matters in his job, to the residents and his colleagues. It’s the same feeling of belonging that we get when we join any group whether at work or in our free time. We feel a part of a larger community where we can contribute to others’ lives...
Hey, What’s the Rush? How about Stopping to Smell the Roses
Life today can be a dizzying carousal ride. We rush to catch a plane. We run to hail a cab. We race to work so we’re not late, and then we try not to rush to get through our work. We cut sleep so we have more hours during the day. The young rabbinical intern at the Jewish New Year service Barbara attended relayed a story in her sermon about how more people are starting their days earlier—think 2 a.m. so they can have lots more time to exercise and meditate before starting the “real” day at 8 a.m. or...