Ask AI: Your New Therapist in Cyberspace is Ready to Help

We are becoming more dependent on Artificial Intelligence (AI), whether by choice or not. It knows when we’ve searched a site for information and then bombards us with more info. It steps into operating rooms to help perform surgery and offers legal advice, even without a degree, license or our permission. 

We decided to take matters into our hands and pose five questions that interest us to see how helpful its advice might be with topics many of us have pondered and posed to expensive professionals. You judge the effectiveness of the responses to your own questions.

Overall, we discovered that AI offers helpful tips, some with a sense of humor. And we thought that was a human trait. We suggest using it primarily as a starting point rather than for definitive answers. One of the best reasons to try it is that it responds instantaneously. However, as Teddy Rosenbluth writes in “Need Medical Help? Don’t Ask a Chatbot,” ( “Well” section,  The New York Times, March 3, 2026),  “A.I.-generated health advice is frequently wrong, a study finds,” so it might be wise to steer clear of that source for health concerns.

The responses we provide here are a condensed, edited version of what AI spewed out. It seems to compile information from many sources it credits such as different Facebook posts and sites like The Everymom, Momwell, WebMD, YouTube, Greater Good Science Center, Business Insider, America’s Test Kitchen, and individuals like Jenhatmaker.com (author, podcaster, speaker), so at least it knows what it doesn’t know and has a broad reach. Sometimes it also encourages seeking my additional professional help such as “consider family therapy” and reading further on the topic. Think of it as your research assistant.

Question #1: My mother-in-law fails to observe boundaries, whether with gifts, time with grandkids or asking nosey questions we’d rather avoid. What can I/we do besides try to change the topic?

Answer: Dealing with a mother-in-law (MIL) who disregards boundaries requires a combination of clear communication, consistent enforcement and a united front with your spouse. The goal is to establish "couple-first" boundaries that prioritize your nuclear family's well-being while managing interactions with extended family. Strategies for handling a boundary-stomping MIL:

1. Establish a United Front with Your Spouse 

• Get on the same page: Discuss and agree on boundaries, ensuring you are a team.
• Partner-led communication: Ideally, your spouse should communicate boundaries to their own mother, as the parent-child relationship is stronger and less likely to cause a rift than if you do it.
• Present a united front: Even if your partner handles the conversation, you should be present to show you are aligned. 

2. Set Clear, Specific and Firm Boundaries 

• Be direct and polite: Use "I" statements to express your needs, such as "I need to have notice before you come over".
• Define Non-Negotiables: Clearly state what is not acceptable, such as unsolicited parenting advice.
• Don't over-explain: You do not need to justify your boundaries.
• Use the "4 C's": Clarity, Communication, Consistency, and Compassion to maintain limits. 

3. Enforce Boundaries 

• Apply consequences: If a rule is broken, enforce consequences such as disengaging from a phone call.
• Be a broken record: Calmly restate your boundary without getting defensive.
• Prepare for resistance: Expect pushback or guilt-tripping; stand your ground. 

4. Manage Interactions and Distance

• Avoid the trap: Do not feel obligated to respond to every call or text immediately or attend every family function. 

5. Shift Your Perspective by reframing 

• Assume positive intent if possible: Sometimes boundary-crossing comes from a place of wanting to feel needed, not malice. Adjust your thinking.
• Do not take it personally: Understand that her behavior reflects her anxiety or need for control, not a judgment of you.

6. Try these Key Phrases

• "Thank you for the advice, but we are going to handle it this way."
• "I’m sorry you’re upset about this, but this is the decision we’ve made."

If these actions do not work, consider family therapy to help address enmeshed dynamics. 

Question #2: Many people over 65 are having plastic surgery or doing procedures to help them feel and look younger. Should I change my mind and get with it?

Answer: There is absolutely nothing wrong with you for not rushing into plastic surgery or using AI tools to plan it. In fact, taking time, doing research and resisting the pressure to quickly alter your appearance is considered a responsible approach. 

Why Not Rushing is Good:

• Preventing Regret: Research shows that, depending on the procedure, up to half of patients can feel regret, making careful consideration essential.
• Safety First: Plastic surgery is not a one-size-fits-all approach and requires careful planning regarding your health, medical history and recovery time.
• Trends Fade: Trends in appearance change rapidly, but surgical results are long-lasting; waiting ensures you make decisions based on what you want, not what is trendy.
• Manage Pressure: There is often intense societal pressure to treat aging like a failure, and taking a step back allows you to evaluate what is right for you, rather than just reacting to that pressure. 

Key Considerations:

• Personal Philosophy: Whether you want to preserve your look or go for a total change, it should be on your own timeline. 

If you are considering procedures, consulting with a qualified, board-certified surgeon is safer than relying on digital trends or AI tools.

Question #3: What is the best way to make a new friend? So many say you can’t do so in your later years. We find it not to be true, but how best to advise others who may not be outgoing?

Answer: It’s a myth that you cannot make new friends when older; it is simply harder due to busy schedules, decreased proximity to peers and less spontaneous social time. While research shows making friends requires deliberate effort and hundreds of hours, fostering "weak ties" (neighbors, colleagues) can create new, meaningful connections. 

• The Time Factor: Studies suggest it takes 94 hours to turn an acquaintance into a casual friend, and over 200 hours to become close friends.
• Reality: Friendships are still very possible but require active scheduling, initiating and stepping out of comfort zones, rather than waiting for friendships to happen organically.
• Benefits of Aging: While harder, friendships later in life can be more profound because they are based on shared values and mutual choice rather than convenience. 

How to make new friends as an adult:

• Be Persistent: Be proactive in reaching out.
• Join Groups: SilverSneakers recommends joining hobby, fitness or volunteering groups to meet like-minded people.
• Leverage Weak Ties: Psychology Today suggests befriending neighbors, coworkers or regulars at a local coffee shop.

Question #4: Why don’t people offer written or verbal thanks for gifts, kind deeds, contributions; is it passe?

Answer: People often fail to send thank-you notes due to procrastination, a shift toward faster digital communication or viewing it as an outdated formality. While formal written notes are less common, expressing gratitude is not passe and crucial for relationship building. 

Why People Don't Thank Others:

• Procrastination and Carelessness: Notes are left to the last minute and often forgotten.
• Cultural Shift: The formality of handwritten notes has faded, with many favoring quicker digital texts or emails.
• Feeling of Compulsion: Some view thank-you notes as forced, arbitrary etiquette or a source of guilt rather than genuine expression, leading to a decision not to participate.

Is It Passe?

• The Gesture Remains Important: Appreciation is never out of style, according to experts consulted by HuffPost.

While the method of thanking has evolved, expressing gratitude for gifts and contributions is essential for fostering positive relationships.

Question #5: It’s so much harder to entertain at home with this person not eating this and another only eating that. What’s a home cook to do besides ask guests to brown-bag it?

Answer: Entertaining at home with diverse dietary restrictions in 2026 involves adopting a casual, customizable approach and focusing on naturally inclusive foods like fresh vegetables and proteins. Here are some specific ideas:

1. The Modern Make Your Own Strategy

The most effective way to handle multiple diets is to offer interactive food stations where guests customize their plates. For example. Choose-Your-Own Platter: Start with beet hummus, avocado wedges and veggies, allowing guests to add dips or toppings. Or Build-Your-Own Bar: Create a taco bar, grain bowl or salad bar where proteins, cheeses and sauces are on the side. Consider a Condiment Tray: Offer herb sauces like gremolata, pickled red onions and hot chiles so guests can season foods to their own preferences. 

2. Leverage AI for Menu Planning & Safety

AI tools can significantly reduce the cognitive load of cross-referencing allergies.

• Ollie AI: A top 2026 AI planner learns family preferences and creates custom menus and shopping lists based on specific dietary restrictions.
• Samsung Food: Uses AI to identify ingredients from photos and suggests recipes based on what you have, ensuring dietary needs are met.
• Allergen Detection: Use tools like Healify, which can identify hidden allergens in food ingredients, to ensure safety.
• Label Apps: Use ChatGPT to generate recipes based on strict constraints (e.g., dairy-free, nut-free, vegan risotto recipe). 

3. Menu Trends for Inclusive Hosting

• Focus on foods that are naturally gluten-free or dairy-free, such as roasted root vegetables, quinoa salads or high-quality roasted fish.
• Avoid overly processed meat substitutes; instead, focus on making vegetables and legumes the star of the show.
• Fresh fruit topped with whipped coconut cream and toasted nuts is a perfect, universally safe and sophisticated dessert that excludes sugar.
• Elevate mocktails with artisanal mixers, botanical spritzes, or home-infused syrups, satisfying both drinkers and non-drinkers. 

4. More Hosting Logistics

• Ask for restrictions early when inviting.
• Keep condiments and pre-packaged items in their original containers so guests can read labels.
• Use separate utensils for each dish to prevent cross-contamination. 

Bottom line: You can plug in your questions to Chat GPT or whichever AI platform you prefer and get fast answers. Responses might not be what you want to hear, so it’s up to you to be the ultimate decider whether to take AI’s advice with a grain of gigabytes.